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Thanksgiving

It’s true of nearly everything—gifts, massages, meals, hugs, praise—that the better you are at receiving the better you’ll be at giving. It’s true of gratitude as well. If you find yourself deflecting other people’s efforts to thank you with a dismissive wave of the hand, a falsely humble headshake, or a blocking phrase like “not at all,” or “it was nothing,” then knock it off! For everyone to benefit maximally from an act of thanksgiving, that act must be accepted. If someone lobs a sincere “thanks” your way, do them—and yourself—a favor: look them in the eye, smile, and say, “you’re welcome.” Enjoy it! That’s what gratitude is all about, after all—giving, receiving, and enjoying.

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Health in Adolescence

“You can’t separate physical and emotional well being,” says Corey Hickman, CTRS, a residential life director for InnerChange. Because of this, his team of recreation specialists engineers their recreation program to be more than just fun and games. They consider recreation to be a critical treatment modality, equally as important as talk therapy and other treatment approaches for addressing adolescent emotional problems.

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Why Do People Lie?

While it’s normal to test lying as a coping and management strategy, parental consequences can help drive home the point that normal doesn’t mean effective. A calm, non-reactive approach to constructing and implementing consequences for lying can help save your teen from a much tougher set of consequences at work or in other important relationships as an adult.

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Oppositional Defiant Disorder

If you’re already relationally in the red with your teen or an oppositional disorder is emerging, opportunities to make deposits will be scarce. In this situation your teen is likely to be guarded and unreceptive. Hinman suggests that this situation might make it necessary to engage outside help. This help might be a therapist, a member of the clergy, or a favorite aunt or uncle.

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Re-learning How to Sleep

A huge part of every parents’ job when their child is in treatment is to prepare for their return home. You’re a better parent (and employee, and friend, and everything) when you’re taking good care of yourself, so self-care is a critical part of that preparation. Sleep is at the core of self care; so now’s a great time to practice good sleep habits. Here are a few tips to help you take care of your main nighttime parenting responsibility: sleeping!

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My Teenager Argues About Everything

According to family psychologist, Jack Hinman, argumentativeness is a necessary developmental pattern for adolescents. The good news? It’s normal. The bad news? You can’t entirely control or stop it.

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Managing Anger as a Parent

If your teenager is having difficulties, chances are she’s also causing difficulties—especially for those who love her the most. Parents of emotionally troubled teens often suffer just as much or even more than their struggling child. It’s the instinct of all good parents to put the needs of their children first. In a crisis, it’s normal (if heroic) parental behavior to abandon their own well being in order to protect, assist or rescue their child.

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Screen Addiction: Teens

It’s easy to mistake normal behaviors for healthy behaviors. Just because everyone is doing something does not mean that it’s without serious consequences. Problems arising from overuse of screen-based technologies typically stem from excessive use leading to isolation, unhealthy relationships, and social and emotional delays, i.e. immaturity.

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Turning Crisis Into Opportunity

Following a family crisis–while your still open, flexible and a little messy inside—is the best time to break the old habits that festered into dysfunction in the first place and create some new ones. The good news is that a lot of personal growth work can be awfully nice! Following are several areas to explore that can complement the intervention, treatment, therapy and medication your family has just experienced, leading to longer-term healing instead of just emotional triage.

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Treating Enmeshed Teens and Parents

Most of us want to connect and most of us want to be accepted by others. We just need to channel our efforts to meet these needs in a healthy direction. That’s what we aim for with enmeshed relationships at Innerchange, to redirect relational energy in a direction that will bring out the most peace, connection, and growth possible.

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